10237: PB004.4 - Ismeretlen

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While there was no resolution between the flamer and I, I did note down several points from her comments which might reflect blind spots about myself. These are areas Iíll look into further as I continue writing at my blog. Getting Flames Has Its Positive Sides This might seem counter-intuitive, but at the end of the day, this experience helped me realize receiving flames has its positive sides. You and your blog have achieved a certain mark If you are just running a small blog with a readership of 2 a day (of you and your mom/dad), chances are no one is going to flame you. People arenít going to bother to reading and criticize you with long messages. Itís only when your blog grows to a certain size when flames start coming in. Clearly, flamers regard your blog and you in some manner, and thatís why they make the effort to flame you. Thus, as your blog grows bigger and bigger, you will receive more flames. As my blog grew in the past year, I have gotten more negative criticisms which I see as a positive sign. Thatís because it means (1) my blog is growing and reaching out to more people and (2) these criticisms help me to improve. Iím prepared for more negative criticisms and more flames as I grow my blog. Itís part and parcel of growth. It lets you know the readers who care If you have readers who care for you, they will step up to defend you. This was what happened for me. After I approved the comment, several readers stepped in to defend me. I didnít know some of them, so it was definitely very encouraging and heartwarming to witness their support. I also received more encouragement messages via email and private messages, which made me feel there were people out there who really cared for me. Shows you your blind spots Blind spots are parts of us which we are unaware of. All of us, no matter whether we are a problogger or a new blogger, have our own blind spots. These blind spots prevent us from growing our blog to the next level. While flames may not be pleasant to receive, they give you a perspective different from the one you have been using. Even the inability to deal with the flames appropriately reveals your blind spots. This recent experience dealing with this flame has helped me uncover more blind spots which will be important in my growth. How you reply can help you win trust among your readers If you reply the flame in a graceful and constructive manner, it will help you win trust among your readers. This helps to establish stronger credibility. My 1st reply to the flamer wasnít one I was proud of, but I worked to address it through a follow-up reply, where I explained my situation earnestly to my readers. My readers followed up with supportive messages and it was great to get the affirmation on their support. Final Words At the end of the day, everyone will have different opinions. You can account for them as much as possible, but if someone chooses to interpret what you have written in a different manner, it is that personís choice. You donít have a choice over whether people want to flame you or not, but you do have a choice over is how you react and what you learn from the situation. The key is to react appropriately and fairly (Steps 1-6) and get the maximum learning out of the situation (Step 7). Check out my other guest post at Problogger How To Get Featured By The Press (Repeatedly) Even If Your Blog Is New, which shares how you can get your blog featured by in press and media. Celes writes at The Personal Excellence Blog, where she shares her personal stories and insights on how to live your best life. Some of her top reader favorites are 101 Things To Do Before You Die and Are You Sleepwalking Your Life Away?. Add her on

PB004.4 by Ismeretlen
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